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It#39;s possible to become a more compassionate person by training your brain, according to a new study.通过训练你的大脑可以使你成为一个更富有同情心的人,根据一项新的研究。Researchers found that engaging in compassion meditation -- where you practice feeling compassion for different groups of people, including yourself -- seemed to increase a sense of altruism.研究人员发现进行慈悲冥想——在那你练习为不同群体的人感到怜悯,包括你自己——似乎增添了利他主义的感觉。;It#39;s kind of like weight training,; study researcher Helen Weng, a graduate student in clinical psychology at the university, said in a statement. ;Using this systematic approach, we found that people can actually build up their compassion #39;muscle#39; and respond to others#39; suffering with care and a desire to help.;“这就好像是举重训练,”参与这项研究的翁海伦,大学临床心理学的一名研究生,在一份声明中说。“使用该系统的方法,我们发现人们可以建立他们的同情肌,用关心和渴望提供帮助来回应他人的苦难。”The study, published in the journal Psychological Science, involved having study participants engage in a compassion meditation where they thought about when others have helped them to relieve their own suffering. They repeated compassion mantras, such as ;May you be free from suffering. May you have joy and ease.; And they also completed an exercise where they practiced compassion for groups of people including friends, ;difficult people; and themselves.这项研究发表在《心理科学》杂志上,研究的参与者进行了慈悲冥想,在那他们想到其他人帮助他们缓解自己痛苦的时候。他们重复慈悲咒语,比如“愿你从痛苦中解脱出来。愿你拥有欢乐和轻松。”他们还完成了一项练习,他们练习为一群人包括朋友、“敌人”以及自己祈祷。Meanwhile, another group of study participants serving as the control group just learned a technique called cognitive reappraisal, which is when you reappraise your thoughts so that they are less negative.与此同时,另一组参与者作为对照组,只是学习了认知重评技术,就是当你重新评估你的想法这样它们就不那么消极。Researchers conducted brain scans of both these groups, before and after their trainings.研究人员在训练前后对这两组人进行了脑部扫描。Then, they compared the altruism of the cognitive reappraisal group with the compassion meditation group by having them all play a game that involved donating money to people in need.然后,通过让其玩一个捐钱给需要的人的游戏,他们比较了利他主义的认知重评组与慈悲冥想组。The researchers found that the people who did the compassion training and who had the highest levels of altruism were also the ones who experienced the most brain changes in the inferior parietal cortex (involved in empathy) when exposed to others#39; suffering.研究人员发现,那些做了同情训练的人和拥有最高水平利他主义的人在感受他人痛苦时也成为了那些在顶叶皮质(参与移情)方面经历大脑变化最多的人。;The fact that alterations in brain function were observed after just a total of seven hours of training is remarkable,; study researcher Richard J. Davidson, who is a professor at the university and the founder and chair of the Center for Investigating Healthy Minds, said in a statement.“大脑功能的改变仅在七个小时的训练之后被观察到的事实是引人注目的,”大学教授和调查健康心智中心的创始人及主席,即研究人员理查德#8226;j#8226;戴维森在一份声明中说。Of course, it shouldn#39;t be all too surprising that meditation boosts compassion in the brain. Past research -- including a study published earlier this year by Harvard and Northeastern university researchers -- shows that meditation can help to boost do-good behavior.当然,这不应该太奇怪,冥想增加了大脑中的同情。过去的研究,包括今年早些时候由哈佛大学和东北大学的研究人员发表的一项研究——显示冥想可以帮助促进公益行为。 /201305/241727Taking a page from the popularity of dollar stores in the U.S., consumer-goods manufacturers, retailers and restaurants throughout the euro zone have discovered the power of the round price point and are introducing one-euro products aimed at budget-conscious shoppers. 从美国“一美元商店”的高人气获得启发,欧元区的消费品生产商、零售商和餐厅发现了这一价格点的魅力,纷纷向想要省钱的购物者推出价格为一欧元的商品。 Unilever, Danone SA, Starbucks Corp. and McDonald#39;s Corp. in recent months have pushed one-euro products to light a fire under a consumer market in deep recession. The recession in Italy, for example, has pushed the number of Italians living below the poverty line up 14% in the past two years, spurring families to cut back on basic staples such as food. 联合利华(Unilever)、达能集团(Danone SA)、星巴克(Starbucks Corp.)和麦当劳(McDonald’s Corp.)最近几个月都力推一欧元商品,刺激处于深度衰退之中的消费者市场。比如,过去两年中,意大利的经济衰退促使生活在贫困线以下的意大利人增加了14%,刺激意大利家庭缩减在食品等基本商品上的出。 #39;Poverty is returning to Europe,#39; says Jan Zijderveld, head of Europe for packaged-goods maker Unilever. #39;You see 120 million people in that low-income segment. We need to get our brands to consumers who are having a hard time making ends meet.#39; 包装商品生产商联合利华的欧洲负责人齐德维尔德(Jan Zijderveld)说,贫困正重返欧洲。你看到有1.2亿人属于低收入群体。我们要让我们的品牌为消费者接受,他们如今生计艰难。 As a result, the one-euro price, about .30, is emerging as an important tool in responding to the euro zone#39;s crisis. Manufacturers are shrinking existing products to fit into the price, while restaurants and supermarkets are discounting items to grab the attention of consumers -- all in an effort to prop up the profitability of their European businesses. 因此,一欧元的价格(约合1.30美元)成了响应欧元区危机的一个重要工具。生产商们正缩减现有产品的规格以符合这个价格,餐厅和超市则将商品打折以吸引消费者的注意――这一切都是为了撑其欧洲业务的赢利能力。 #39;One euro is a magic price point in Europe right now,#39; says Lloyd Burdett, head of global clients for Futures Co., a consumer-insights consulting firm. #39;There is a feeling that the stuff will arrive at that price point anyway and their margins were going to get squeezed.#39; 洞察消费者需求的咨询公司Futures Co.的全球客户主管伯德特(Lloyd Burdett)说,在欧洲,一欧元现在是一个有魔力的价格点。给人的感觉是,商品无论如何都会达到这个价格点,其利润空间将遭到挤压。 The dollar-store concept gained a foothold in Europe with the U.K.#39;s Poundland Ltd. chain. Poundland was founded in 1990, but it exploded in the past decade, with 450 stores today that sell pregnancy tests, light bulbs, toilet paper and other items to Britons of all income levels. The retailer is adding 60 stores a year offering thousands of products at the #39;round pound#39; price point. 一美元商店的概念在欧洲立足与英国的Poundland Ltd.连锁有关。Poundland创建于1990年,但在过去10年中飞速发展,如今拥有450家门店,向所有收入水平的英国人出售验棒、灯泡、厕纸以及其他商品。这家零售商每年新增60家门店,提供成千上万种价格为整整一英镑的产品。 After Britain, the concept found its way to the euro zone via Germany, where several chains specialize in one-euro products. A leader is Germany#39;s TEDi GmbH, which started in 2004 and has opened about 150 stores a year that mostly carry one-euro products, such as beauty supplies, stationery and games. TEDi now has more than 1,300 outlets in Germany and began expanding into Austria and Slovenia. 继英国之后,“一元店”的概念通过德国进入了欧元区,德国有几家连锁店专门销售一欧元商品。其中一家领先者为德国的TEDi GmbH。该公司创建于2004年,每年开设约150家门店,主要销售一欧元商品,如美容产品、文具及游戏。TEDi如今在德国有1,300多家门店,并开始向奥地利和斯洛文尼亚扩张。 Just as in the U.S., the lure of the one-euro price point in a dismal economic environment stems from a simple, easy-to-understand price that supplanted the 99-cent price tag. 跟在美国一样,在不景气的经济环境中,一欧元这个价格点的吸引力源自一个简单易懂的价格,它排挤掉了0.99美元的价格标签。 #39;The one-euro price has an immediate impact,#39; says Massimo Bellandi, who has a stand selling one-euro toiletries, household items and stationery at an open market in the Italian town of Marina di Pietrasanta. #39;It lights a fire in our customers.#39; On a recent Saturday morning, large, handmade yellow posters emblazoned with #39;Everything at One Euro#39; hung over a stand piled high with products such as toilet paper, Nivea hand cream and Timotei shampoo, a Unilever brand. His sales of one-euro items have risen about 20% in the last couple of years. 贝兰迪(Massimo Bellandi)在意大利Marina di Pietrasanta镇的一个露天市场经营一个摊位,出售价格为一欧元的化妆用品、家居用品和文具。他说,一欧元这个价格能够产生即时的影响。它点燃了顾客的热情。不久前一个周六的上午,写着“所有商品均为一欧元”的手工制作大幅海报挂在摊位上方,摊位上堆满了厕纸、妮维雅(Nivea)护手霜和联合利华出品的Timotei洗发水等商品。过去几年里,他的一欧元商品销售额增加了约20%。 The boom has help wipe away the stigma of one-euro stores, as consumers -- rich and poor -- find virtue in landing a bargain. In response, consumer-goods makers who had shunned discount stores in Europe increasingly are making less-expensive products for such outlets. Consumer-goods makers also have jumped on the trend as a way to fight the rise of private labels and maintain shopper loyalty. 一欧元店的繁荣帮助消除了其带来的耻辱感,因为消费者(无论穷富)都发现了购买廉价商品的好处。受此影响,此前避开欧洲折扣店的消费品制造商现在越来越多地为这种商店制造价格便宜的产品。消费品制造商迎合这一趋势也是为了应对私人品牌的崛起以及保持顾客忠诚度。 The push fits into a broader trend of shrinking package sizes in Europe. Unilever has launched a series of small packages, including some priced at one-euro, use expertise gained in developing markets. 这一趋势也与欧洲更广泛的缩小包装尺寸的趋势相吻合。联合利华已推出一系列小包装产品,其中一些产品定价在一欧元,这一举措利用了该公司在发展中国家市场取得的经验。 Smaller packages are a tried-and-true formula by consumer-goods companies to generate higher profits from cash-strapped consumers. Manufacturers spend less on packaging, while the unit price of the item is normally higher than for large packs. 推出小包装产品是消费品公司从囊中羞涩的消费者获得更高利润的一个可靠方法。制造商们得以减少包装出,同时小包装产品的单价通常要高于大包装产品。 #39;It#39;s easier to downsize a pack than demand price increases from the consumer,#39; says Tom Vierhile, of consulting firm Datamonitor. #39;Consumers are more sensitive to the final price they pay than the size of the box.#39; 咨询公司Datamonitor的沃海勒(Tom Vierhile)说,缩小包装尺寸要比提高产品售价容易的多,与包装尺寸相比,消费者对他们最终付的价格更为敏感。 Silvana Cocci, a 62-year-old grandmother from the central Italian town of Prato, is drawn by the one-euro products at discount shops. With an elderly mother to support, Ms. Cocci has grown more worried about her budget in the past couple of years and has switched to one-euro products for items that she considered generic, such as hand soap. 来自意大利中部城市普拉托的现年62岁的科奇(Silvana Cocci)被折扣店里的一欧元产品所吸引。由于要赡养年迈的母亲,过去几年科奇对自己的预算状况越发感到担忧,在肥皂等她称为一般性商品方面,她已经转为购买一欧元产品。 #39;It#39;s not like we can#39;t afford things, but you just don#39;t know what will happen next,#39; she says. 她说,并不是说我们买不起贵一些的产品,但你不知道接下来将发生什么。 In Spain, Unilever has introduced a five-wash package of its Surf detergent priced at 1 euro. In Italy the company is promoting a range of one-euro Cornetto ice creams this summer, with the price splashed on the cone. 在西班牙,联合利华已经推出售价一欧元的Surf洗涤产品五件套装。在意大利,今年夏季该公司正在推销一系列散装出售的售价一欧元的可爱多(Cornetto)冰激凌。 French dairy group Danone, which has been hit hard by the downturn in Europe, is recommending that retailers sell its four-pack of Danette, a puddinglike dessert, for 1 euro, rather than the usual price of 1.39 euros. It produced new packages emblazoned with #39;Prix Choc#39; on the front. 法国乳品集团达能对四个装的布丁甜点Danette给出的建议零售价是1欧元,原先售价是1.39欧元。该公司为这个产品换了新包装,在前面印上了“Prix Choc”。达能因欧洲的衰退而遭受了严重打击。 Restaurants and cafes also are getting in on the trend. Starbucks this spring rolled out a line of #39;petite#39; cookies, croissants, and pastries for 1 euro each. And in Spain, Italy and Germany, McDonald#39;s is offering a changing selection of products for 1 euro. At the moment, it is selling beer and Coke at 1 euro each in Spain and salads and milkshakes for the same price in Italy. 餐馆和咖啡馆也加入这一潮流。星巴克在今年春季推出了“小”曲奇、牛角面包和甜点,售价均为一欧元。在西班牙、意大利和德国,麦当劳推出了会经常调整的一欧元产品系列。目前,麦当劳在西班牙出售均为一欧元的啤酒和可乐,在意大利出售同样价格的沙拉和奶昔。 The push is paying off. In 2008, Spanish restaurant chain 100 Montaditos introduced a Euromania deal on Wednesdays that helped triple sales through 2011. The items -- a mix of mini b rolls topped with Spanish ham, sauces or other ingredients -- don#39;t change, but on those days virtually every item costs 1 euro. Last summer, as consumption collapsed amid Spain#39;s second recession in five years, the company began offering Euromania on Sundays as well. 此举取得了成功。2008年,西班牙餐饮连锁店100 Montaditos开始在每周三提供Euromania餐,到2011年该公司销售额增长了两倍,这在一定程度上也是受到这个计划的提振。Euromania餐的菜单包括几款上面撒着西班牙火腿和调味汁等作料的迷你面包卷,这个菜单不会改动,但在周三实际上每款产品的售价都在一欧元。去年夏季,在西班牙出现的五年来第二次衰退导致消费受到冲击之际,该公司开始在每周日也提供Euromania餐。 #39;Euromania on Wednesdays has been the engine of the company,#39; spokeswoman Anne Corcuera said. The number of 100 Montaditos outlets in Spain increased to 250 last year from 112 in 2007. The company plans to add 100 restaurants in Spain, while expanding in Portugal, Italy and the U.K. 该公司发言人科奎拉(Anne Corcuera)说,每周三的Euromania餐一直是公司的增长引擎。去年100 Montaditos在西班牙的餐馆数量从2007年的112家增至250家。该公司计划在西班牙增开100家餐馆,同时在葡萄牙、意大利和英国进行扩张。 /201308/253346

Amassing wealth is terrific─as long as you can tap into it when you need to.积累财富是件绝妙的事情──因为当你需要的时候就能够利用它们。But what if many of your assets are illiquid?但是如果你的财产很多都是非现金性质的,那该怎么办呢?That is a common problem among some wealthier investors. When the perfect investment opportunity comes along─say, a real-estate project or private-equity fund─these investors are unable to redeploy funds quickly.在一些比较富裕的投资者中,这是一个普遍的问题。当绝好的投资机会到来时──比如,一个房地产项目或者私募基金──这些投资者无法迅速调动资金。To combat the problem, investors increasingly are turning to low-interest-rate loans from private banks or wealth-management firms to tap anywhere from ,000 to hundreds of millions of dollars. They use a pool of their own securities, artwork or even aircraft as collateral.为了应对这个问题,越来越多的投资者从私人或财富管理公司申请低息贷款,借取75,000至数以百万计美元不等的资金。他们使用自己持有的有价券、艺术品甚至飞机作为抵押。Corporate executives have borrowed against their stock holdings for years using such loans. Known as #39;structured lending#39; or #39;borrowing against holdings,#39; the practice grew more popular among smaller investors in 2012, say executives at wealth-management firms and private banks.公司高管们通过这类贷款用所持股票作抵押借取资金已经有好些年了。财富管理公司和私人的高管们说,这种操作行为人称“结构性贷款”或“股份抵押借贷”,2012年在小投资者中越来越流行了。At Raymond James Bank, a subsidiary of Raymond James Financial, a St. Petersburg, Fla.-based financial-services company, securities-based loans outstanding rose to 4 million at the end of 2012 from million in March.瑞杰(Raymond James Bank)是总部位于佛罗里达州圣皮特斯堡(St. Petersburg)的金融务公司瑞杰金融集团(Raymond James Financial)下属的子公司。该以有价券作抵押的未偿贷款从2012年3月的4,100万美元上升到了年底的4.14亿美元。#39;People are feeling a lot more comfortable and want to re-enter business transactions,#39; says Anne McCosker, co-head of credit products at the Wealth and Investment Management division of Barclays . #39;At the same time, banks are generally increasing their appetite for credit again.#39;巴克莱(Barclays)财富和投资管理部负责信贷产品的联合主管安妮#8226;麦科斯克(Anne McCosker)说,“人们现在感觉轻松多了,想要重新进入商业交易领域。与此同时,也普遍重新增加了放贷量。”Securities-based loans, or loans made against pools of securities, are increasingly attractive to clients because of their low interest rates and flexibility, says Jordan Waxman, a managing director and partner at HighTower#39;s HSW Advisors, which has about billion under management. Currently, annual interest rates fluctuate between 1% and 2%. He says loan liabilities comprise million of assets under management at his practice.HighTower公司所属HSW Advisors的常务董事及合伙人乔丹#8226;韦克斯曼(Jordan Waxman)说,有价券类贷款,也就是以有价券为抵押获取的贷款,因其低利率和灵活性的特点对客户越来越有吸引力。HSW Advisors管理的财富达10亿美元左右。目前此类贷款的年利率在1%和2%之间波动。韦克斯曼说他管理的资产中60%是贷款负债。Clients have been using the loans for opportunistic investments that should return more than the cost of borrowing the capital to invest, Mr. Waxman says. Depending on the loan, there might also be no set #39;due date#39; for when clients have to repay the loans.韦克斯曼说,客户使用这种贷款进行机会性投资,这些投资的回报高于借贷的成本。根据具体情况,有的贷款可能没有设定客户必须偿还贷款的“到期日”。The loans carry advantages and drawbacks.这类贷款有利有弊。On the positive side, the loans let people keep their portfolios intact, without having to forsake future profits in the market and having to incur capital gains, says Andrew Kaiser, chief operating officer of Goldman Sachs Bank USA, a unit of Goldman Sachs Group.高盛集团(Goldman Sachs Group)下属美国高盛(Goldman Sachs Bank USA)的首席执行长安德鲁#8226;凯泽(Andrew Kaiser)说,从有利的方面来看,这类贷款可以让人保持投资组合的完整性,无须放弃未来的市场利润,也无须交纳资本利得税。Borrowers should remember they must pay back the loan with interest─and might end up having to sell of a portion of their securities to do so if the value of the securities declines, warns Bill Geis, executive vice president of retail lending at Raymond James Bank. Typically, clients use the income generated by the investments made possible by the loan to pay it back. But if those investments sour, the borrower still is on the hook.瑞杰负责零售贷款的执行副总裁比尔#8226;盖斯(Bill Geis)警告说,借款者应该记住,他们偿还贷款时必须付利息──如果券的价值下跌,他们可能最终不得不卖掉部分券来还贷。一般来说,客户使用成就他们投资的贷款所产生的收益来偿还贷款,但是如果那些投资失败,借款者便会陷入困境。The interest rate on the loans tends to be floating, says Mike McPartland, head of investment finance for North America at Citi Private Bank, a unit of Citigroup. The rate is typically tied to the 30-day London interbank offered rate. If the interest rate is Libor plus one percentage point and the 30 day-Libor is 0.25%, then the interest rate on the loan would be 1.25%. Some firms offer fixed rates as well, says Ms. McCosker of Barclays.花旗集团(Citigroup)下属北美花旗私人(North America at Citi Private Bank)的投资财务负责人迈克#8226;麦帕特兰德(Mike McPartland)说,这类贷款的利率往往是浮动的。它的利率一般是和30天的伦敦同业拆借利率(London interbank offered rate,简称Libor)相关联的。如果这种贷款的利率是Libor+1%,而30天的Libor是0.25%,那么它的利率就是1.25%。巴克莱的麦科斯克说,有些贷款也提供固定利率。Loans differ depending on the nature of the collateral, Mr. McPartland says. For example, securities that are less volatile, like municipal bonds and Treasurys, will on average command an #39;advance rate#39; of 85%. So, if you put up million worth of securities, you would receive a loan worth million. The advance rate would be lower if the securities were noninvestment grade.麦帕特兰德说,贷款因抵押品性质的不同而有差异。比如,像市政债券和国库券这些稳定性较好的券平均会获得85%的“放款率”。因此,如果你的抵押债券价值5,000万美元,你会得到4,300万美元的贷款。如果债券属于非投资级债券,放款率就会低一些。Banks are more likely to lend against more liquid offerings, like securities, than against assets like interests in a hedge fund or private-equity fund that are harder to value, says Mindy Rosenthal, executive director of the Institute for Private Investors, a New York group for high-net-worth families.纽约为高净值家庭务的私人投资者学院(Institute for Private Investors)的执行董事明迪#8226;罗森塔尔(Mindy Rosenthal)说,相对对冲基金投资和私募基金投资这些比较难以估价的资产,更愿意以券等流动性更强的资产为抵押发放贷款。Still, Stephen Brodie, a partner at law firm Herrick, Feinstein in New York who represents six different private banks in lending to high-net-worth individuals, says art loans are #39;far more common#39; today than they were three or four years ago.六家向高净值个人提供贷款的私人的法律代表、纽约Herrick, Feinstein律师事务所的合伙人斯蒂芬#8226;布罗迪(Stephen Brodie)说,如今艺术品抵押贷款比三、四年前“常见多了”。Works of art can be tough to sell quickly, and usually have advance rates from 40% to 50% of a conservative value estimate, Mr. Brodie says. Interest rates on those loans might be Libor plus two or three percentage points, says Scott Milleisen, a capital adviser at J.P. Morgan Private Bank, a unit of J.P. Morgan Chase.布罗迪说,艺术品很难快速出售,通常其放款率只有其保守估价的40%-50%。根大通(J.P. Morgan Chase)下属根大通私人(J.P. Morgan Private Bank)的资本顾问斯科特#8226;米莱森(Scott Milleisen)说,这类贷款的利率可能是Libor加2-3个百分点。To use art as collateral, clients also must pay appraisal fees to the bank─but they usually get to keep the art on their walls.要使用艺术品作抵押,客户也必须向付估价费──但是他们通常能把艺术品继续挂在自家的墙上。 /201304/232940

Thanksgiving break is here, which means it#39;s time for the “Turkey Drop”.感恩节假期来临,这也意味着“放弃火鸡”的时候到了。Many college freshmen are home this week for the first time since August. They’ll retreat to what is comfortable – spending time with family, old friends, and for some, a high-school sweetheart. Thanksgiving will also be a time for big questions, particularly for those freshmen still in high-school relationships. Did they take advantage of their first three months in college, or did they lose out by spending too much time on Skype? During their first trip home, freshmen have to decide whether they stick it out with their first love, or succumb to what is known as the “Turkey Drop”— the phenomenon of high-school couples breaking up when they come home for their first Thanksgiving.本周很多大学新生都会回到家中,这也是自八月以来的首次。他们将重返舒适的生活——与家人、老朋友、对一些人来说,还有高中时的男女朋友呆在一起。感恩节也是解决一些大问题的日子,尤其是那些还保持着高中时期情侣关系的大学新生们。他们是否充分利用了大学的前三个月呢?或者他们是否因为花费太多时间在网络电话上而过于松懈了呢?在他们第一个归家假期里,大一新生们必须要作出决定——是要继续他的初恋,还是向著名的“放弃火鸡”理论屈。(“放弃火鸡”理论是指高中情侣们纷纷在第一个感恩节放假回家时提出分手的现象。)Much of my own freshman year in college was determined by one recurring scene. A friend knocks on my door. She tells me her plans for the night – maybe a sorority party or a pregame in a friend’s room – and asks me if I want to come along. I look at her, all dolled up in heels and a cute crop top, and then I look back at my bed, soft and warm, offering a Saturday night of TV, calls with high-school friends, and microwavable macaroni and cheese. Do I push myself to meet new people (and risk spending the next four hours smiling and saying “hey, where are you from?” so many times that my face starts to hurt), or do I fall back on the familiar?我大一那年总是反复出现这样一个场景。一个朋友敲响了我的房门。她告诉我她今晚的计划——可能要去一个朋友的房间参加一个女生联谊会或者一个赛前准备活动——问我要不要加入。我看着她,穿着高跟鞋,装扮可爱,然后目光又定格在自己的床上,温暖舒适,似乎过一个周六电视夜,叫上高中时的朋友,再准备一些微波通心粉和奶酪才是我想要的。我是应该让自己去认识一些新的人(并且冒着花费接下来的四个小时不停地微笑、寒暄“嗨,你家是哪的?”直到面部僵硬为止的风险),还是继续过我熟悉的那种生活?One Princeton junior told me that, during her first three months in college, she stayed in her room every Friday and Saturday night. She didn’t go out because her high-school boyfriend didn’t want her to. The first time she drank alcohol, he “fell apart.” When she signed up to join a sorority, he started a screaming match. She knew she was missing out on important college experiences, but there was still something that made her stay with him for the first few months.一个普林斯顿的大三生告诉我,在大学的前三个月里,她每个周五周六都呆在自己的房间。她不出去是因为她高中的男朋友不希望她出去。她第一次喝酒,他“崩溃”了。她报名参加一个女生联谊会,他开始大呼小叫。她知道她错过了很多重要的大学经历,但是在这几个月里总有些什么让她觉得不能和他分手。“First semester of freshman year, you don’t have that many real friends, so when my high-school boyfriend would show up, I would be like, ‘Yes, here is someone I trust, that I can actually tell things to,’” another junior said. “He was someone who would just instantly understand what was happening with me emotionally. I would want to just hole up in my room for the rest of the weekend, talking to him.”“大一的上学期,没有什么真心朋友,所以当我高中的男朋友出现时,我就会觉得‘对,他就是我信任的人,我可以倾诉的人’”,另一个大三生说道。“他就是会立刻懂得我在想什么的人。我愿意整个周末都把自己关在房间里,跟他聊天。”So when does this affinity for the familiar start to change? In the first few months of college, there are those long, lonely freshman nights – times when you wonder whether you’ve actually made any real friends. By November, however, most freshmen have gotten over the worst of their homesickness. The “Turkey Drop” happens in part because freshmen realize they no longer need the safety blanket of their high school significant other.那么这种亲密的关系是从什么时候开始改变的呢?在大学里的前几个月,总会有一些漫长又孤寂的新生夜——那些夜晚你会不住地想自己是否有真正的朋友。然而到了十一月,大多数新生都从想家最折磨的阶段恢复了出来。“火鸡”现象的发生部分是因为新生们意识到他们已经不再需要高中那个至关重要的另一半带来的安全感。According to Dr. Christopher Thurber, a psychologist at Phillips Exeter Academy, going home for Thanksgiving – being surrounded by people they love – can actually help freshmen to get over their homesickness. “When you’re homesick, your actions – being tearful, staying in your room a lot – will cue in the people around you, and prompt an appropriate social response,” said Thurber. “People will reach out to you, and that often will boost the student’s confidence. This in turn will help them overcome feelings of homesickness.”Christopher Thurber士,一个菲利普斯埃克塞特学院的心理学家表示,回家过感恩节——周围都是自己爱的人——会让新生们的恋家情绪不治而愈。“在你想家的时候,你的行为——眼泪汪汪,经常闷在自己的房间——会给你周围的人发出一个信号,带来一个适当的社会反应,”Thurber说道。“人们会去接近你,这也会提高学生的自信。反过来,这也会帮助他们克恋家情绪。”When I came home for Thanksgiving my freshman year, I was also shocked by how much I’d changed. I went to a high school where the majority of students had been living in the same town since kindergarten. Most people had similar views on political issues and didn’t have experience with cultures different from our own. Then I moved into my freshman dorm, and met a roommate who had just flown in from South Korea. At Thanksgiving, it felt strange to reunite with my group of high school girlfriends, who all grew up within a 20-mile radius.在我大一那年回家过感恩节的时候,我完全被自己的改变震惊了。我就读的高中大多数学生都从幼儿园起就住在一个镇上。大多数人对于政治问题都保持着相似的见解,也没经历过和我们小镇不同的文化氛围。之后我搬进了新生寝室,室友刚刚从韩国来。感恩节的时候,再和我高中的朋友们重聚显得些许怪异,她们都在二十英里以外的地方长大了。;A freshman will think, ‘When I was with this girl in high school, I thought we were going to be together forever. Then I got to college and saw that there was so much going on – different people and places and things.’ The committed match that you had in your mind might not look the same when you go home for Thanksgiving,” said Thurber.“新生可能会觉得‘高中时我们俩在一起的时候,我以为我们一辈子都会在一起。之后我上了大学,发现未来的路还很长——不同的人,不同的地方和不同的事。’你脑海中曾经坚定的想法可能在你回家过感恩节的时候又不一样了,”Thurber说道。Almost everyone I interviewed said there was no way to casually be in a long-distance relationship in college. If you were weren#39;t together everyday on campus, then you had to make sacrifices, and you didn#39;t make sacrifices if things weren#39;t serious. One junior told me that, freshman year, her high-school boyfriend revealed his plans to propose the day after graduation. She broke up with him a few weeks later.几乎所有受访者都表示在大学里维持长距离的关系可能性不大。如果你们不能在大学里每天在一起,就必须得做出一些牺牲,而如果不够认真你就不会做出牺牲。一个大三生称,大一时,她高中时的男朋友透露说毕业的第二天就会向她求婚,而几周后,她就提出分手了。;The nice thing about the college atmosphere in terms of relationships is that you can ease in to them – you don’t have to know where you stand, you don’t have to be really certain,” said a current college junior. “But with long distance, there’s the implication that you’re in it for the long haul. Having a long-distance relationship in college doesn’t just mean long distance. It means long distance, long term.”“对于关系,大学氛围最好的一件事就是你可以轻松地享受这段关系——你不需要知道你在哪,也不需要十分确定,”一个现在就读大学三年级的人说道。“但是长距离的关系就意味着你要长期维持。大学里的异地恋不仅仅意味着距离远,也是在说双方的感情要维持很久。”By late November, you realize that the long-distance, marriage-proposal kind of commitment is fundamentally opposed to the ideals we’re taught to associate with college. A lot of women told me they felt guilty about having a high-school boyfriend because it just wasn’t what you were “supposed” to do as a freshman. When I asked them exactly what they were supposed to be doing instead, no one had a concrete answer. A few vaguely mentioned drinking more heavily, or being free to consent to a dance floor make-out, but there was clearly something else.到十一月下旬,你就会意识到长距离,以婚姻为目标的承诺和我们与大学联系在一起的想法是完全相悖的。很多女性都告诉我有一个高中男朋友让她们感到很内疚,因为这并不是一个大学新生应做的事。我反问她们那个时候到底应该做些什么时,没人给我一个具体的答复。有几个人含糊地回答说应该多喝些酒,作为“自由人”去赴舞池约会,但当然不止这些。From movies like Animal House, Van Wilder, and 21 and Over, we get this idea that college is the only time in our lives when we can do stupid, drunken things and not get in too much trouble. The bridge of Asher Roth’s legendary rap anthem, “I Love College,” offers freshmen just one piece of advice: “Do something crazy!” In college, you’re supposed to make mistakes because those mistakes become cool stories – the kind that build character and street cred. But it’s hard to feel free to make bad decisions when you’ve got someone from home sending you a constant stream of text messages on Saturday night.从《动物爱回家》,《留级之王》,《21玩过界》等电影中,大学是我们生命中唯一一段可以做愚蠢的事却惹不上大麻烦的时光。罗斯(Asher Roth)的传奇饶舌颂歌的桥梁,“我爱大学,”给大学新生们提出了一条意见:“做点儿疯狂的事!”在大学里,你应该犯错,因为这些错误日后都会变成很酷的故事——能塑造性格和名声的那种。但是如果家那边有个人总在周六的晚上给你发一条又一条的信息,你可没办法去自由地做这些事。There’s more to this cultural idea of college than wild parties. Leaving home, we’re told that the next four years will be a time to experiment and figure out what we want to contribute to the world. Most juniors and seniors I know chose to major in a department different from the one they listed on their college application. That’s because we’ve all taken risks, learning about topics we didn’t expect to love. The whole process is trial and error: Try a lot of different things, and see what works. The biggest pressure for freshmen to “turkey drop” comes from knowing that we may never again be this free to explore.而大学的文化层面甚至比聚会狂欢还包含更多。一离开家,我们被告知接下来的四年试验并搞清楚我们想为世界贡献些什么的时间。我认识的大多数大三生和大四生都选择了和他们大学申报表上填写的不同专业,这是因为我们都冒了险,学习一些我们没预料到会喜欢的内容。整个过程就是反复试验:尝试很多不同的东西,看哪个好用。大学新生“火鸡放弃”最大的压力就是明白我们可能再也没法这样自由地去探索了。 /201312/267168

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